The long wait is nearly over. Tomorrow morning I go into hospital for my laparoscopy.
I’m now quite nervous. I fought so hard to get to this point. Even my consultant thinks its a waste of time. I finally convinced him by pointing out that I have to get my Mirena implant changed before January and because I’m a virgin, they have to knock me out to do it. So, I said, if you’re already going to have to knock me out for that, why not have a wee look around while you’re in there? He laughed and said he admired my guts.
I don’t know how to prepare myself. Everything could change. My ovary could be really damaged. There might be endo. There might not be endo. It could just be scar tissue from when they lasered the endo off four and a half years ago. It could be adhesions. There might not be anything.
And the Mirena. I know it doesn’t work the same for everyone but for me, its meant four and a half years with no periods. And when you spent your teenage years dreading that time of the month which in my case lasted 15 days filled with pain and severe bleeding…not having that has been a miracle. I don’t know how I would cope if this one didn’t work as well and if I start having periods again.
I know I will though. Whatever tomorrow brings, I’ll handle it. It might take a while but I’ve dealt with so much up to this point and I really feel like this could provide some answers. Today is just so nerve-wracking.
See you on the other side.