benedict cumberbatch

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My ideal man

Published June 11, 2013 by crazyinpink

What I would like my ideal man to be like

A list by crazyinpink expressed through the medium of Benedict Cumberbatch

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1. My ideal man is sweet and understanding.


2. He shares my values and beliefs.



3.  He has passions and interests that make him unique and accepts my passions too.



4. He has get-up-and-go and pursues what he’s after, whether it’s a particular career, a crazy ambition or, you know, world domination.


5. He makes me laugh.

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6. My ideal man, of course, wants children.


7. He can be serious when he needs to be.

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8. He can also be unbelievably goofy.

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9. He has his flaws but they’re overshadowed by everything else.

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10. He is caring and will always take care of me.



Why I should never be allowed to watch Benedict Cumberbatch in public

Published May 28, 2013 by crazyinpink

For those of you who live in a cave, Robinson Crusoe style, perhaps you haven’t noticed that a little movie called Star Trek Into Darkness came out recently.  Or, y’know, maybe you’re just normal and actually have a life. Unlike me.

I actually had the date of it’s release in my diary.


I went to see it on that date. Obviously.  Since then I’ve seen it again and I’m working on finding a buddy for my third venture into deep space.

Although I’ve never been a true trekkie, I am aware of Star Trek tradition and the week before the movie came out, I watched the first reboot movie which was released in 2009.  I was quite shocked to find that I actually enjoyed it. My taste in movies has always been eclectic.  My Disney collection rests among rom-coms of the late 90s/early 00s, murder mysteries, gross-out Judd Apatow-esque selections, musicals and superhero epics. I wasn’t really expecting to like Star Trek as much as I did, never really been very into sci-fi as a genre. But an excellent moment came when Spock quoted a line from Sherlock Holmes “Whenever you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth.”

But the new movie: Star Trek Into Darkness would be even better…because it featured this.


So evil. So sexy..

The first moment his voice filled the cinema, I let out what my friends described as “an inappropriate moaning noise”.  Then his gorgeous chiselled face filled the screen and I thought I would die. Excepting the National Theatre Frankenstein I saw last year broadcast into a small independent cinema at uni, I’d never seen him on a big screen. It was heavenly.

The movie itself was pretty awesome but the Batch stole the show. Aside from my inappropriate moaning, I also let out a loud “awwww” when his character cried.  According to one of my friends, who was really only there ’cause we dragged her along, I shouldn’t have been sympathising with him since he was the villain. And a sexy, badass villain at that.  I know that logically I should be rooting for Kirk and Spock and all the rest of the good guys but I just couldn’t help siding with him and his gorgeous bass English accent.  I am such a sucker for an English accent these days.

I’d like to say I behaved more appropriately the second time round but that would be a lie. Even though I knew what was coming, I still couldn’t contain my excitement. I gasped and made involuntary squeaking noises the whole way through.  And, if I find someone willing to go see it with me again, I will no doubt do the same thing.

I can’t help it, he’s so beautiful.

What are your specialist subjects?

Published May 14, 2013 by crazyinpink

Six friends, one charity pub quiz, many discoveries of specialist subjects.

In the UK, there’s a tv show called Mastermind (I don’t know if they have it in other countries but it def started here).  Each contestant has to sit in the Big Black Chair of Knowledge (it is actually just a normal chair, I’ve made it sound more dramatic than it actually is) and answer questions in two rounds; General Knowledge and their chosen Specialist Subject.  They can pick literally ANYTHING in the WHOLE, ENTIRE WORLD OF THINGS to answer questions on.

I’ve often wondered, in that way you do when you’re trying to avoid doing anything remotely useful, what my specialist subject would be.  What would give me the competitive edge in a test of the mind.  Aside from minor historical episodes I’ve researched for dissertations and therefore know inside-out, back-to-front and from every possible angle, there are only a few things I think I know well enough to choose for my specialist subject.  These things mainly revolve around the many obsessions I have: Elvis songs, Disney movies, Benedict Cumberbatch, the tv show QI or Miss Marple.

At the pub quiz on Saturday night our team of six graduates with various careers and interests represented a lot of specialist subjects.  A primary school teacher knew about some French scientist and his experiments with gravity or something.  A geography graduate with a ridiculous penchant for pop music knew about the Italian version of the tour de France.  A fellow history geek who studies witches knew about the beginning of genetics.  And what, I hear you ask, did I bring to the team?

Well, in true crazyinpink style, my personal strengths lay in Disney-related trivia.

Except for one or two questions about local history I also knew. (It would have been extremely embarrassing if I didn’t since I’m studying the history of the city we were actually in.) But here are the ways in which my Disney-saturated mind came into its own.

1. Recognising a black and white photo of Walt Disney in the picture round.

2. Being able to recall the name of an obscure Greek god by replaying scenes from the Disney movie Hercules in my head.

3.  In a name that year question, the quizmaster showed a range of things that happened in one particular year. Some famous people died, somebody else won the Nobel prize. Nothing rang any bells. Until… Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End was released this year.  I instantly whispered ‘2007’ to our designated scribe.  Greeted by blank looks, I proceeded to explain exactly when every Pirates of the Caribbean movie was released.

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So, I think I’ve inadvertently discovered my specialist subject.  What would yours be?


Now that I’m (apparently) a grown-up…

Published October 1, 2012 by crazyinpink

I officially became a PhD student four days ago.  And, suddenly, it is as if I’ve stumbled past the fur coats and into the magical world of adulthood.  Doing a PhD means you’re serious, you’re intellectual and you are somehow wiser than you were when you were finishing your Masters two weeks ago.  At least, this is the impression I’m getting.

Exhibit A:  There is a guy at uni, a third year PhD student, who has always treated me with disdain and condescension.  It all started over two years ago when I was giving a paper at a conference in Dublin and happened to be in his panel. He took one look at my pink dress, blonde hair and shiny lipgloss and decided I was a bimbo.  In a world where grey is not just a cultural source of excitement in its current literary form but an unspoken uniform for ‘boring academics’ with bad shoes I do tend to stand out.  I’m used to people making a snap judgement and talking to me like I’m five.  I know that after one tutorial with me or academic discussion, they backstep and realise they were wrong and actually, I do have a brain underneath all this blonde hair.  But not PhD guy.  He listened to my paper, even asked to see a copy in writing, and has continually met me at academic events since but has always held fast to his original impression of me.  But at some point over the last week, he has decided that I am worthy now that I have ‘PhD candidate’ after my name in the university.  And other people have been treating me differently too.  The transition from Bachelors to Masters was nothing like this.  Everyone just accepted that spending another year at uni was my way of hiding from the big bad job market. But now…it seems that they see me in a whole new light.

It has made me wonder if maybe I should see myself that way too.  Therefore, I present my PhD Resolutions both serious and ridiculous because, in reality, that is exactly what I am.

Now that I’m a grown-up…

1) I will not just go to academic functions for the free coffee and biscuits but will make an effort to ‘network’

2) I will buy a pipe that I never actually smoke but will sit in my office for me to chew on while I’m thinking deep thoughts

3) I will decorate my office in pink because that is who I am and to hell with the boring beige people

4) I will memorise one important-sounding quotation and use it in every situation when I don’t know what to say

5) I will recite this quotation while staring off significantly into the middle distance

6) I will find a way to incorporate Victorian crime writing into my research so I have a viable excuse to be in the same room with Benedict Cumberbatch

7) I will write everything important down in a notebook because thanks to all my medication I will forget something important

8) This notebook will, of course, be pink

9) I will stop waiting for things to happen and make them happen myself (Note: I put this into action the day I got my new student card, with an expiry date of Sept 2016, scary.  I decided that I would ask out Butter as we no longer work together and it would resolve whatever it is that has been going on between us.  It’s now four days later and he hasn’t replied)

10) I will stop worrying about whether or not I am eating too much chocolate because clearly, there are more important things for my brain to be thinking about.  And chocolate cures all things.


Beautiful Blogger, me?

Published September 26, 2012 by crazyinpink

Later than promised, I would like to say a huge thank you to the lovely Rachel at for nominating me for the Beautiful Blogger Award.

To accept the award, I post this image, write a little tidbit about the blogger who nominated me, write a list of 7 things about myself, and finally, nominate 7 bloggers to receive this award as well.

I’m still not quite used to the world of blogging though I’ve been here for several months and one of the greatest people I’ve met here is the wonderful Rachel.  Her blog always makes me smile and the work she does to raise awareness of chronic pain and invisible illnesses is really admirable.  I love reading what she’s up to and I admit, I’ve plagiarised some of her phrases to help explain things (dishes and spoons especially). She is a true endo sister and I’m honoured that she thought of me for this award.

Okay, now seven things about me.

1. I am about to start a PhD in History.  This is simultaneously exciting and terrifying with a pinch of ‘what the hell am I doing?’

2. I own about 100 pairs of shoes.  My life motto: Life is short, buy the shoes. (I also LOVE the ‘Shoes’ video too)

3. Everyday I wear incredibly bright colours because I think it is hard to feel sad when wearing bright yellow.

4. I have had a disease called endometriosis since I was 13.  I’m currently waiting on an operation to remove diseased tissue throughout my pelvis.  It causes chronic pain which I live with every day but I try to not let it beat me.

5. I own every single piece of QI merchandise, including every single episode.  It is the best show ever!  When I finished school I went to London to be in the audience of a recording.  My dream job would be to be a QI Elf (researcher).

6. I might be a teensy bit obsessed with a certain pale cheekboned gentleman called Benedict Cumberbatch.

But, really, how can you not be in love with him?

7. I sometimes think that if I didn’t have all the health problems I have, I wouldn’t be the person that I am today.  I wouldn’t have true friends who are so precious and genuine and I wouldn’t appreciate the ‘good days’ because I wouldn’t really grasp how bad ‘bad days’ can be.

And finally, the bloggers I’d like to nominate are:

1.  another endo sister sharing her experiences

2. providing much needed info and talking about all the ways endo affects you

3. honest and inspiring (and given me a justifiable reason to eat ice cream after internal examinations!)

4. always makes me smile


She reads magazines

Published August 13, 2012 by crazyinpink

I nipped out of the office at lunch time to head over to the shop.  The twittersphere detailed a certain Mr Cumberbatch being on the front page of the Telegraph magazine so I picked up a copy (and a half-priced chocolate bar).   It was only when I sat down at my desk to peruse the paper while eating my sandwiches that I realised the tweets I read were a few days old and the magazine only comes out on Saturdays.  Blonde moment.  I read the paper anyway and was suddenly taken back to my A Level Politics days of devouring world news and living off current affairs.  Although I never harboured any political ambitions I took two optional courses in Politics in my first year as an undergrad and again became an avid news-watcher.

Once I didn’t have to know exactly what was going on in politics, I fell out of the habit.  I am just not a person who can do something half-heartedly.  My mum describes me as very ‘black and white’ and I guess I am in some ways.  If I like something, I like it a lot.  Once I spent some time away from politics I couldn’t get back into it. It took so much time and energy and I have other passions which I feel more strongly about.  I’ll still raise my head and sniff curiously when there’s a general election or a public enquiry but I’m definitely not the newshound I once was. 

Embarrassingly, I’m now more of a magazine kind of girl.   Not celeb mags though *shakes head despairingly* I like fashion, shoes and shameless stories about getting in touch with the ‘inner you’ or how to talk your way out of a bad second date.  As such, I am an avid reader of Glamour and Cosmo. I enjoy just kicking back (usually in the bath), turning my brain off for a while and letting the bright colours and energetic journalism wash over me.

The title for this random musing comes from a song of a local band I used to like.  I only really went to their gigs because I was dating the bass player but some of their songs were annoyingly catchy and even now, after three years, I find little refrains going round in my head.  This song was about an intellectual guy frustrated by his attraction to a seemingly dim-witted girl and his attempts to successfully woo her even though they had nothing in common.  My favourite lines were ‘I’m talking Tolstoy while she reads magazines’ and ‘I buy her sweeties, but she’s got diabetes’.  And I’m sorry but if you rhyme ‘sweeties’ with ‘diabetes’ you already get a big thumbs up from me.  This song seemed to represent how Bass Player viewed our relationship.  He took the silly random things I do as symbolic of me not being overly intellectual.  We met at uni and he therefore knew how smart I am and the grades I get but somehow kept trying to introduce me to more cultural pursuits, buying me weird Japanese novels, making me watch arty subtitled movies and generally trying to improve me. 

The thing is, I know I am intelligent.  I’m not trying to blow my own trumpet but I’m comfortable in my cleverness.  However, I also know that I’ve only achieved the academic success I’ve had because I work damn hard at it.  I worked hard to get into a good grammar school where I worked hard for my GCSEs and A Levels to get into a great university.  I got a first class degree with honours, picked up awards, secured funding for my Masters and now stand on the precipice of a fully-funded PhD; all because of the hard work and determination I’ve put into my studies. 

The Academic Me is only part of my personality.  I can’t be that smart all the time, it would be exhausting.  I enjoy my downtime.  I love watching murder-based tv shows.  I have a pretty unhealthy obsession with Benedict Cumberbatch.  I like looking at shoes, buying shoes and judging the shoes of others. It makes me happy when I have brightly coloured nails and matching jewellery.  I have a fondness for the guy humour of Seth Rogen and Will Ferrell. And I like to read magazines in the bath.

A new month, a new me?

Published July 5, 2012 by crazyinpink

July has only just begun and already so many things have happened. I’ll try and create a cohesive list but I only had three hours sleep last night so, to quote one of my favourite tv shows, ‘bear with!’


1) I got a date for my operation!

YAY! Not really something most people would be excited about but then again, most people haven’t spent the last three and a half years in total agony fighting within the health system to get someone to listen and investigate the pain.  My consultant has made it clear he thinks it unlikely he will find anything.  He left it up to me and I’d rather know one way or the other.  I’ve pretty much accepted that I’ll have to make sacrifices in life and that I’ll probably always have to live with this condition but it would just be a relief of sorts to have someone confirm what it is causing all this.  The confirmation letter came two days ago, I go in on the 17th.  I’m half-excited, half-terrified but I’ve decided that whatever comes of it, I can rest assured that I did everything within my power to find out what’s wrong with me. (Yes, in my mind I am convinced it is endo but even though I was diagnosed 4 years ago, no one seems to take heed of it)


2) I foresaw my possible future in a comedy movie

I went to see the Five Year Engagement yesterday. I knew that my Fairy Godmother had seen it and didn’t like it at all. I quite like Jason Segel and found the idea of it intriguing.  Now, it isn’t laugh-a-minute and I didn’t find it as funny as Knocked Up or I Love You, Man but I did enjoy it.  It got its laughs from awkward situations, something which I easily identify with. I have a tshirt that says ‘Well, this is awkward’ on the front and ‘well, that was awkward’ on the back. I should wear that a lot. 

Anyway, yes, the female character (played by Emily Blunt – an odd but strangely believable choice) is an academic. I don’t think I’d be giving away too much of the plot if I said that she gets a post-doc fellowship and they move for her to take it up, thus prolonging the length of their engagement.  As she settles into the academic life, I found myself getting more and more uncomfortable.  Jason Segel as her husband-to-be (adorable as ever) struggles with the strain her intellectual success puts on their relationship.  I’ll be honest, it scared the crap out of me. I’ve been thinking that my health would be the biggest obstacle to a future serious relationship, I never even thought about my probable career choice.  What if I become Violet?  What if I pursue my academic dreams to the detriment of my personal life? I left the cinema with a head full of thoughts and worries over my future.

3) I flirted like nobody’s business

I am a flirt anyway and I’m okay with it.  It’s just part of who I am, I like the chase and the banter.  But this week it went into overdrive.  In work on Monday, I discovered further proof that Jam and I are, in fact, made for each other when he revealed he loved Irn Bru just as much as I do.  This may seem like the stupidest thing in the world to get excited about but considering how much stick I get for being addicted to the orange stuff, it was just too cool to find this out.  He had stopped drinking it because it had too much sugar and was making him hyper and he hadn’t even heard of sugar-free. So, naturally, I brought him a bottle on Tuesday and left it on his desk.  When I saw him an hour or so later he was practically bouncing up and down saying he knew straight away it was from me and that it had totally made his day.  By the end of the day, he was telling me that I had re-ignited his old addiction and that he needed more.  We joked that I was enabling him.  I flirted with him shamelessly, boosting his ego to the point where he said that I quote; “always make him feel awesome”.  I was his very own enabler with both his Irn Bru addiction and making him feel better just by being around.  Naturally, this delighted me. However I also spent most of Tuesday working alongside his housemate Butter (upon whom my friend has a crush) and chatting to him.  Butter and I get along great and we barely shut up all day.  At one point I realised that I was perhaps being too friendly to him but then he threw some things into the conversation which made me wonder.  Talking about the house he shares with Jam and its lack of tidiness, I expressed surprise that Jam would be untidy.  Butter responded, ‘Well, when you see his room, you’ll believe it.’  I stumbled and questioned this, asking why on earth I would be in his room to which he mysteriously replied, ‘But when you come to our house, you’re going to be in his room’ as if it was the most obvious thing on earth.  So, all over again I am left in a wonderment over how Jam feels about me and in a new quandary over whether I should do anything.

4) I discovered that in spite of everything, my life is pretty damn awesome

An old school friend got in touch last week to say she was moving in a stone’s throw from where I lived and would I fancy a catch-up? I popped by yesterday and saw her for the first time in three years.  We chatted and caught up fully.  Every story I told seemed so fantastic to her. Even the medical saga.  She marvelled at how so much has happened to me since we left school while she has done very little.  I suppose, when you look at it objectively, I have achieved quite a lot.  It’s easy to forget and get so bogged down in the here and now but really, I have a lot to be thankful for.

5) Things are FINALLY back to normal with Best Friend (hooray!)

The weirdness that has been lingering over us since early March was finally Expecto Patronumed away today as we had brunch and saw each other for the first time in weeks. It feels so good to have my friend back.  I don’t know what did it, maybe the time apart, but whatever it was, I’m so pleased that phase is over.  He did raise concerns over my male companions, particularly after I told him about the last conversation I had with Lucius. (We had coffee and Lucius told me, while holding my hand, that he was attracted to me but couldn’t act on it because he wanted to keep me as a friend and if he let himself start he would ‘ruin’ me and remove all my innocence.  It was certainly an….interesting conversation.) He did like the sound of Jam though.  Although, truth be told, I am so infatuated with Jam that I was making him sound like a god among mere mortals.  A theoretically attainable object of perfection.  The next best thing to Benedict Cumberbatch. I haven’t had it this bad in a looooooooooong time.  I feel like I’m 14 again.

It’s alive! It’s alive! My thoughts on a strange, Frankenstein-filled week

Published June 16, 2012 by crazyinpink

This week has been quite strange.  I was able to do quite a lot. Yay!

On Monday, I spontaneously went pirate golfing and for dinner with a group of people I don’t know just ’cause my crush invited me.

On Tuesday, I went out after work for dinner with some co-workers, again just ’cause someone randomly invited me.

On Wednesday, I tutored in the afternoon and in the evening I headed over to church for a music rehearsal (I’m leading the worship in church tomorrow).

On Thursday, I finished reading all the source for the project I’m working on. I popped into the office to use the microwave and visit my Fairy Godmother.  Then after another hour or two in the library I went out for dinner with the girls from my endo support group. I was the first to leave and was given a yellow rose (well, I was given two, one for me and one for my mum). I walked up to the train station in the rain with my giant uni bag carrying two roses. I must’ve looked so strange.

I met my friend at the train station and we went round to see the National Theatre Live screening of Frankenstein.  When it was screened last year I was in hospital so I was not going to miss these encore screenings! The two lead roles of Dr Frankenstein and The Creature were played by Jonny Lee Miller and Benedict Cumberbatch. Each night they switched roles.  Both versions are being shown, and I wouldn’t be a true Cumberbitch unless I went to see both!  So Thursday night was Miller as the Creature and Cumberbatch was the Dr. The first fifteen minutes or so were a bit odd as the Creature came to life and learnt to walk and move.  It reminded me of those awful GCSE Drama classes when the teacher obviously couldn’t be bothered and used to make us pretend we’d just been born and were experiencing everything for the first time.

Anyway, it picked up and soon, I was hooked.  Watching a recording of a play is a strange experience but it was such a beautiful production.  The lighting was utterly astounding (I never thought there would be a day when I would be commenting on lighting of all things but it was pretty amazing).  The two actors were unbelievably good.  JLM’s Creature was so vulnerable it was nearly heart-breaking. Cumberbatch’s Victor was detached and cool without being cruel.  It was easy to see certain Sherlock-esque characteristics in his delivery of deduction-style lines but he was very convincing as the tortured genius.   The supporting cast were…interesting. Naomie Harris as Victor’s fiance was brilliant. I am a big fan of hers anyway but she was quietly dignified and gentle. Confusingly, Victor’s family were all black when Cumberbatch is as pale as I am (and I am so pale I can’t find foundation that matches my skin tone – they don’t have a shade called ‘Vampire’).  His little brother was brilliant but the father was a strange portrayal.  There were other stand-out supporting roles; the blind man was easily my favourite character and the Scottish assistants Victor hired to grave-rob provided much-needed comic relief.  My friend and I left feeling that we had spent a very intellectual evening in the company of this play as it questions the origins of good and evil.

Friday I spent in the company of my missionary letters, chipping away at my project due next week before heading out to a graduation party last night.  My friend (the same one from Frankenstein) is graduating next week so had a little party, mostly her family and a few friends.  I ended up watching the football discussing Belfast industries from the 19th century with her Welsh great-uncle.

Today I’m working away on my project and tonight going to a party in church.  A guy from church is 40 this week, he has Downs and is the nicest guy ever. We’re having a surprise for him and sending him to Liverpool to see his favourite team play next season. Tonight we’re having a bit of a feed and a dance, it should be good fun.

Then tomorrow I’m leading the worship as the young adults take our morning service. I’m also doing a solo during the service.  My grandparents are coming up for lunch for Fathers Day and then tomorrow night I’m back at the cinema to watch the other version of Frankenstein with a Cumberbatch Creature. Can’t wait!! (and not just because he comes to life wearing only a dainty loincloth) 😉

Benedict Cumberbatch – the love of my life

Published May 18, 2012 by crazyinpink

I’m shocked it had taken me this long to dedicate a whole post to the wonder that is Benedict Cumberbatch.  My twitter is full of mentions of the Batch and a fair few of my followers are fellow Cumberbitches.

The obsession began with Amazing Grace, a film I first saw years ago and quite fancied the guy playing William Pitt.  Then I watched BBC’s Small Island and again was struck by this unconventional-looking actor who was so compelling that even though he was absent for most of the series was still my favourite part of the show.

It wasn’t until Sherlock that the obsession truly came to maturity. I was in love. Most people still didn’t know who he was but I had a crush on the man with the incredible cheekbones. Something about that striking silhouette with the collar turned up and the blue scarf, not to mention of course his fantastic suits (costume dept of Sherlock, I applaud you). By the time the second series aired, most people knew I had a thing for him and in the last few months it’s only gotten worse.

My phone and laptop wallpaper are images of the man himself. My ringtone is the Sherlock themetune. I can spend far too long online simply looking at pictures of him. I buy every paper or magazine that he appears in, usually only finding out about it because one of my loyal twitter followers informs me.  Once, I couldn’t get hold of a particular TV magazine he had been interviewed in and a very lovely girl in Manchester scanned hers and emailed me a copy.

I went to a table quiz on Wednesday night.  It was for leaders of Girls’ Brigade. In our team, I was the youngest and before it started we were discussing our ‘specialist subjects’, one girl said ’80s music’ another ‘soaps’. I said that I was good for ‘Pirates of the Caribbean’ and ‘the life and times of Benedict Cumberbatch’. They laughed at me for thinking it would appear.

Then, for the second picture round, who is number 15??

Yes, I squealed. Then I told the man collecting the answer sheets that number 15 was my future husband. Then I kept the sheets with his picture.


Its not an obsession, its a way of life.