Endometriosis, or endo as it is ‘affectionately’ known, is not a very nice thing. Scientifically, it is a disease where the lining of the womb is found elsewhere in the body, casuing pain and inflammation. There is no cure for this condition, just ‘management’.
For me, endo is a little angry monster that lives in my left side and likes to stop me from doing normal things. This monster claws at my insides, demands I feed it painkillers and keep it warm with hot water bottles. He makes me sleepy and weepy, mopey and dopey, mad and sad.
I was 13 when my monster took up home. As a teenager, noone took me seriously and fobbed me off with the Pill, explaining that what I experienced was ‘normal’. When I turned 18, I demanded to see a gynaecologist who performed a laparoscopy when I was 19. During this operation the doctor evicted the monster which made me very happy.
I then spent a blissful year pain and monster-free!
But then the monster came back…
Angry at being kicked out, he made his presence known in more horrible ways and soon prevented me from doing anything. He made me miss class, miss my friends and he completely changed my wardrobe (the monster does not approve of jeans or other tight-fitting clothing and demands I wear loose dresses and skirts).
My monster has been back for three long years now. During that time I’ve had more blood tests, scans, medications and procedures than I care to remember because doctors do not want to believe that the monster returned. At last, I’ve managed to find a doctor who is willing to look, just to see if the monster might still be there.
And so, I wait for this operation, hoping it will prove the monster is back.